Celebrating the Unpopular Arts
 

Is ‘Die Hard’ a Christmas movie?

This past week, noted provocateur Larry Young, of AiT/Planet Lar fame, wrote on Facebook that he couldn’t believe it was 2016 and we were still debating whether Die Hard is a Christmas movie. It’s long been the standard answer to “What’s your favorite Christmas movie?” of cool people who hate the schmaltz of actual Christmas movies, so it’s long been accepted as a Christmas movie. I, being a contrarian, wrote that it’s not a Christmas movie, which led to some debate, although no one’s mind was changed (Larry’s least of all – he’s very firm in his opinions, as misguided as they might be). I also noted that this is a perfect debate – it’s very fun and completely meaningless! So the question is: Is Die Hard a Christmas movie?

John McClane doesn’t have time for this debating shit!

Obviously, it takes place at Christmas, which ought to make it a Christmas movie, full stop. In the comments to Larry’s post, one person linked to their essay about why it’s a Christmas movie, which makes a compelling case. It doesn’t really matter that Die Hard was released in July; yes, Christmas movies are usually released in the month or so leading up to Christmas, but after the original release date, when a movie is released is no longer relevant, and no one today remembers that Die Hard was released in July and wasn’t marketed as a Christmas movie. So we can reject that line of thinking. Price makes the point that Christmas is no longer solely, or even most importantly, about the religious celebration of Jesus’s birth, but a “second” Christmas – “the over-arching calendar season that merges every level of culture (familial, commercial, entertainment, political, and any other level you can think of) into one coherent and hegemonic force.” He’s not wrong at all, nor even original (not that he claims to be original) – it’s long been known that there are two separate Christmases, to the point where I would love to see the “religious” Christmas moved, as everyone ought to know that the religious Christmas is only in December because early Christians wanted to make it more palatable to pagan Romans, who celebrated the winter solstice as a time of renewal and would be more accepting of a miraculous birth representing the a spiritual renewal if it were tied to their current beliefs. No one knows when Jesus was born (or, you know, if Jesus was born), so decoupling the religious aspect of Christmas from the cultural aspect and letting us have a year-end bacchanal of gift-giving and family dinners without any religious aspects and letting the holiness of Jesus’s birth stand alone and not get overwhelmed by Santa Claus would be a smart thing. But that’s neither here nor there – we’re stuck with this weird amalgam of holiness and commercialism, and Price points out that Die Hard deals with the aspects of “second” Christmas – “Greed, commercialism, feeling out of place, overcoming obstacles, dealing with estranged family, even traveling cross-country — these are all thematic references to the cultural Christmas that we all experience removed from the underlying religious dogma.” So far, so good … but then Price goes too far, I think, and nullifies his argument, or perhaps universalizes it to the point of meaninglessness. He writes:

Finally, the fact that DIE HARD was released in July does not discredit its attachment to the movie; it might actually help reinforce the connection. As Jack Santino noted in New Old-Fashioned Ways, “seasonal schizophrenia” is a marker of the power Christmas has in culture. When a movie — or song, or television show, or comic book or any popular culture text — decides to skip more immediate holidays (say, Independence Day) in favor of tying itself to Christmas, it reinforces for the audience that Christmas is the king of holidays — not just in terms of religious power, but economic and political, too.

What this means, to me, is that “Christmas” is such a powerful force that movies with absolutely no connection to the holiday can be considered “Christmas” movies because they deal in the themes of “Christmas” movies that Price identifies earlier in the essay. I know that’s a stretch, but if we consider that John McClane is trying to reconnect with his family, and that’s a “Christmas” movie theme, isn’t, let’s say, Liar Liar a Christmas movie? If we get into the idea of forgiveness, a “religious” Christmas idea, isn’t Pulp Fiction a Christmas movie? Male protagonists in action movies are always dealing with greed, commercialism, feeling out of place, and overcoming obstacles. That makes Die Hard an action movie. It doesn’t make it a Christmas movie.

No, this doesn’t automatically make it a Christmas movie

My point was that you can set it at any time of the year and it would be essentially the same movie, so it’s not a Christmas movie. In my mind, a Christmas movie has to be tied to the holiday in some way. A person reunites with their estranged family, but only because it’s Christmas (John McClane is not really reuniting with his estranged family, just visiting because his wife is successful when he thought she wouldn’t be – that could happen at any time of the year). Christmas, in some way, affects the action of the characters. In Larry’s Facebook post, some people claimed that because it’s a Christmas party and because security is lessened due to the holiday, it’s a Christmas movie. But it could be any party – the boss says they just had a wildly successful day, so it could simply be a celebratory party – big corporations rarely need that much of a reason to celebrate their greed. I haven’t seen the entire movie in a while, but I don’t recall any indications that security is not as strong because it’s Christmas – Gruber and his guys are just very efficient. But maybe I’m wrong. Still, that also seems like something that could easily be explained away without it being Christmas. Practically nothing else in the movie is “Christmas-y” – it’s an action movie that relies on action movie clichés (not to be disparaging at all – I love action movies, and Die Hard would be on a short list of best of all time if I made such a list), but the actual holiday means very little in relation to the plot.

Nope, the bear is completely unnecessary to the plot

Christmas movies don’t have to be schmaltzy, of course. When people say Die Hard is their favorite Christmas movie because they want to be cool and name a movie that no one – or at least no one until the advent of the Internet – thought of as a Christmas movie, they’re missing an actual great action movie that also happens to be a Christmas movie, one that was released 16 months earlier than it – Lethal Weapon. Like Die Hard, Lethal Weapon was not released during the Christmas season, and like Die Hard, it’s an action movie that happens to take place at Christmas. However, Riggs’s suicidal depression and eventual acceptance by Murtaugh and his family is a redemptive story far more powerful than McClane’s (who, again, is estranged from his wife solely because he was being a douchebag), so it fits the themes of a “Christmas” movie far more than Die Hard does. Another unconventional movie that is a better “Christmas” movie than Die Hard is, of course, Gremlins, which is very much a Christmas movie. The action of the plot is only put in motion because Hoyt Axton needs to buy a Christmas present for his son and he picks perhaps the worst one ever. No Christmas, no gremlins. And despite the fact that I’m writing this on Christmas and it’s sunny and 52 degrees (shockingly cold around these parts for Christmas), the snow in Gremlins really does make it feel more like a Christmas movie, especially because much of the action wouldn’t be possible without the impediments of the weather. So if you want to be cool and not pick a traditional “Christmas” movie as your favorite (and any traditional Christmas movie is acceptable, except Love Actually, which should be killed with fire and never mentioned again), pick Lethal Weapon or Gremlins. Because you can’t argue that those aren’t Christmas movies.

Gremlins singing Christmas carols, however, is ESSENTIAL!!!!

Ultimately, of course, it doesn’t matter. Die Hard is a great movie, as close to the Platonic ideal of an action movie as we’re likely to get, and it doesn’t matter if it is a Christmas movie or not (Die Hard 2 is more of a Christmas movie, because much of the plot relies on the fact that it’s Christmas). If your tradition every year is watching Die Hard after you’ve opened your presents more power to you. But it does kind of bug me when people refer to it as a Christmas movie (especially when they’re so smug about it), because it’s not. Or is it? Sound off in the comments if you feel like it! And I hope you’re having a great holiday season, whether you celebrate Christmas or not!

(Other fun links: a theory on Christmas movies, which claims Die Hard is indeed a Christmas movie, and a definitive ranking of the gremlins in the bar scene.)

And hey, here’s Elizabeth Montgomery and Yvonne Craig to brighten your day:

10 Comments

  1. Edo Bosnar

    Yeah, Die Hard is a Christmas movie. So is Lethal Weapon (although I really don’t like that one any more). And so is Trading Places for that matter. And I consider Groundhog Day a Christmas movie, too…

    Best wishes to you, Greg, and all of the other Junk Shop dealers.

  2. frasersherman

    Lots of Christmas movies aren’t Christmas by that definition. They’re simply an excuse to bring people together–White Christmas could be tinkered with a little and it would do fine as Vermont in July (though probably it wouldn’t be a perennial). And countless “family gets together at Christmas” films could as easily be Thanksgiving or someone’s birthday.
    I have no opinion on Die Hard because I’ve never gotten around to seeing the whole thing, but as a general principle on Christmas movies, I disagree.

  3. Hal

    Great Googly Moogly, that picture of Elizabeth Montgomery! *must catch breath* I could make a few crude and uncalled for sack/sac based puns…but I won’t because “Goll-ee, she’s purty!” I haffa funny feelin’ inma tummy when ah look at the purdy lady, what duzzit mean?! Ahem. (enough horsing around, jerk – Anonymous Ed.)

    Happy Christmas and much festive cheer to you, Krys, and the girls, Greg. Have a much better year ahead as well.

    Sure, Die Hard is a Christmas movie, Mr Burgasio. The confusion comes from cuts to the screenplay and the movie. Y’see, originally it was explained that prior to his days as an ideologically-fuelled terrorist asshole, long before his transformation into a Reagan-era murderous capitalist technothief asshole, he was the Number Two in Santa’s workshop until he could no longer stand to work under the strictures laid down by the big boss man (not the Elvis Presley song or the deceased pro-wrestler – I’m sorry, “superstar”… Heh.) as he felt it was better to rule in (the) Europe(an continent)/Nakatomi Tower than serve in Lapland. Oh, and didn’t you watch the Die Hard sequel in which McClane accidentally kills Santa then is made his replacement? Fer shame, where’s your research, man? Now I Have Answered Your Question… HO HO HO! *smirks annoyingly*

    GREMLINS SINGING CHRISTMAS CAROLS! YEAH! You know I sent that as a clip to celebrate Christmas! (Oh, and a little Nat “King” Cole!) Those little green bastards! (Gremlinist!)

  4. M-Wolverine

    I certainly suppose it could be argued that Die Hard isn’t a Christmas movie; this just isn’t a very good one.

    You’re right to discount release date; Miracle on 34th Street was released in June, and the movie is about Santa Claus!

    But the whole part where the movie must be driven by the holiday doesn’t work for parallel movies, like Lethal Weapon (he just as easily could be depressed by her birthday or their anniversary or whatever), nor for traditional holiday fare (what about losing the money and being desperate as your hero brother comes home from the war in It’s a Wonderful Life can’t take place any other time of the year, other than ambiance?).

    People were long declaring their “ironic” Christmas movies before the Internet. We would long joke that our favorite Christmas movies were Die Hard and Lethal Weapon (and try to add to it with Gremlins, Die Hard 2, and so on). But Lethal Weapon definitely gets underrated after Gibson’s issues. Probably the best buddy cop movie ever. And frankly, its sequels are probably better than the uneven Die Hard sequels, which range from pretty darn good “With a Vengence” to the abomination that was the last one. The only real weakness the Lethal Weapon films have past sequelitis is the bad guy in 3, and that’s pretty much off set by Rene Russo. Of course, Lethal Weapon managed to keep Richard Donner as director for all four, so that kept some level of quality control that the Die Hard series didn’t have.

  5. Simon

    DIE HARD may be a Xmas movie, but it pales compared BATMAN RETURNS, TRADING PLACES, EDWARD SCISSORHANDS, GROUNDHOG DAY, and CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND.

    Next Month: Is “Jesus” a 3rd-century hoax? (TLDR: Yes.)

  6. Jeff Nettleton

    I prefer a non-Christmas/Christmas movie that weaves in the season, like Grumpy Old Men (which I felt like watching, after dealing with last minute nut-jobs all day, on Christmas Eve). It’s not a holiday film; but, events take place over the holiday season and add layers to the story. A better example is the caper film, Fitzwilly. it’s set over a period of time, as a group of servants pull off thefts and cons to keep their mistress in the lifestyle she has known, as well as themselves. The climax is a robbery of Gimbles, during Christmas shopping. Again, it is not a holiday movie; but, interweaves the holiday into the plot. Die Hard merely uses it as an excuse to get Willis to LA, to be there when Rickman and Co. take over. otherwise, it is just set dressing. Die Hard 2 makes a little stronger case, to me, with holiday travel central to events. Lethal Weapon makes a stronger case, with Riggs depression and the family aspects.

    Still, A Christmas Story (not released over the holidays) is still the champ at depicting Christmas, from a child’s point of view.

  7. glowbox

    I agree that something can’t be termed a ‘Christmas movie’ if it simply explores Christmas themes (whatever they are defined as) because there will always be other, definitely-not-Christmas-films which also explore those themes. But I also resist the suggestion that the film must require Christmas to have plot impact, there are very very few films in which Christmas, specifically, has unique plot impact. Gremlins, given as an example of this in the article, could be a birthday in winter (needs a present, still snow) no intrinsic need for it to be Christmas. And many others can be transplanted into a birthday or thanksgiving scenario (as mentioned in a previous comment). The only movie I can think of, off the top of my head, that intrinsically requires Christmas is Jingle All The Way. It needs a children’s gift, it needs a run on that children’s gift because many other people are buying it and it needs a parade. Although conceivably you could manufacture a situation where the specific gift needed is hard to find for some other reason and there happens to be any national holiday happening (like St Patrick’s Day or Mardi Gras or even Gay Pride – I’d watch Arnie get caught in *that* situation). Home Alone, another great example, ostensibly requires Christmas because it needs lots families to be away for the holidays so they can all be robbed, could easily be set over summer vacation, it’s an affluent neighbourhood, it wouldn’t be hard to swing. Even A Christmas Carol (and it’s many incarnations) could be about any change of heart, as demonstrated by Ghosts of Girlfriends Past. I’m open to suggestions but I don’t think there are any fims that couldn’t, with minimal effort, be set at another time of year. UNLESS it heavily features Santa Claus, e.g. Elf, The Snowman, Miracle on 34th Street, The Santa Clause.

    Here’s my theory: the only thing that makes a movie a Christmas movie is concensus. Sound of Music? Nothing to do with Christmas, watched as a Christmas tradition by many. Frozen? Also nothing to do with Christmas but is a family film with lots of snow. Love Actually? Awful, has a couple of gratuitous Christmas references, many people’s favourite Christmas movie. Eyes Wide Shut? Set very much at Christmas, no-one watches this at Christmas.

  8. I just reread an essay in the anthology Murder Ink (a 1970s book about mysteries and mystery writer) that argues there are three types of Christmas mystery:
    •A mystery set at Christmas for convenience (“Oh no, we gathered for a Christmas party, now there’s a murder and we’re stuck here because of the snow!”)
    •A story that uses Christmas joy as a counterpoint to a dark narrative.
    •A story that specifically ties into Christmas more fundamentally.
    I think that breakdown works for Christmas movies in general. Melissa Joan Hart’s “Holiday in Handcuffs” only requires a family get-together (“Oh no, my boyfriend dumped me and I’ll face another vacation with Mom telling me what a failure I am — I know, I’ll kidnap that handsome stranger and force him to pose as my boyfriend!”). It’s a Wonderful Life is dark set against the light. And Christmas Carol, contrary to glowbox, is very much about Christmas — Scrooge in Dickens (and in some movies) is the antithesis of everything Christmas is supposed to mean.
    So we can count them all as Christmas movies, just different kinds of films.
    And yes, those were some delightful photos.

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